Who Do You Need to Say Thank You To? Acts of Deliberate Relationship Enhancement (ADRE)

ThankYouNoteFrom time to time, after a big day like Easter or a Friend Day, our staff sit down and wrote hand written thank you notes to everyone who made that Sunday happen (often 100+ thank you notes).

We write, pray, write and pray some more.  It’s a powerful reminder that you aren’t in this alone . . .and its a powerful connection for your people to receive them too.

I recently read this story in the new Tom Peters book (Little Big Things) – he captures the spirit of ‘saying thank you’ perfectly:

“During my brief White House stint in the mid-1970s, I did something similar, spending eight or nine straight hours one New Year’s Eve on my office phone. I called close to 100 people I worked with—in agencies all over Washington and in embassies around the world—to thank them for their help the prior year.

In addition to enjoying the chats, which I did . . ., I admit that I was purposefully engaging in an ADRE…an Act of Deliberate Relationship Enhancement. I’m not suggesting false sincerity here, as I fully buy the argument that ‘If you aren’t sincere, it’ll come through as if you were using a megaphone.’

I nonetheless urge you to develop some similar ritual. Moreover, I urge you to start it in the next couple of weeks, then get into the New Year’s Habit. Think ADRE. Twelve months a year!”

I love the idea of ADRE – an Act of Deliberate Relationship Enhancement.

Now quit reading this blog and go write 3 thank you notes . . . now.  Go!

With thankfulness for you,


P.S. I recommended Tom’s book, Little Big Things, in the April Church Leader Insights Newsletter.  Did you get it?  You can subscribe to the Newsletter for free by clicking here.

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About Nelson Searcy

Nelson Searcy is an experienced church planter, coach and church growth strategist, working with churches in over 45 denominations. Nelson is also the Founding and Lead Pastor of The Journey Church, with locations across New York City and in San Francisco and Boca Raton, FL. He first developed the Assimilation System 10 years ago at the Journey Church and has since implemented and improved these strategies with over 3,000 churches across all sizes and denominations. He started coaching pastors in 2006 and has personally coached over 2100+ senior pastors, helping them break common growth barriers like 125, 250, 500, 1000 and beyond, all while maintaining personal life and ministry balance. As founder of Church Leader Insights and the Renegade Pastors Network, he has trained more than 50,000 church leaders (3,000+ church planters). He is the author of over 85 church growth resources and 17+ books, including Fusion: Turning First-Time Guests Into Fully-Engaged Members of Your Church and The Renegade Pastor: Abandoning Average in Your Life and Ministry. His continued mission is to help church leaders around the world cooperate with God in creating healthy, thriving churches. Nelson is married to Kelley and together they have one son, Alexander.

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