Last week I kicked off a series of posts called “The Four Loves of a Church Planter.” Here’s a link to the first post in case you missed it:
http://www.churchleaderinsights.com/blog/2009/04/02/the-four-loves-of-a-church-planter-1/

The next love of a successful church planter is their (drumroll please)…

SPOUSE

We have all read and spoken about the painful and damaging ravages of divorce, and how the divorce rate in the U.S. is at 50% or above. Many of us have even shared the more painful statistic that the divorce rate within the church is equal to that of the rest of the country. However, did you know that the divorce rate among pastors is also 50%?

Does that bother you?

It should.

Here are a few other jarring stats for you from a 2006 study:
– Almost forty percent of pastors polled said they have had an extra-marital affair since beginning their ministry.
– Eighty percent of pastors’ spouses feel their spouse is overworked.
– Eighty percent of pastors’ spouses wish their spouse would choose another profession.
– The majority of pastors’ wives surveyed said that the most destructive event that has occurred in their marriage and family was the day they entered the ministry.

These statistics are not an indictment on serving in ministry so much as on how we choose to serve in ministry. Failure to prioritize your marriage and cherish your spouse is a recipe for disaster in ministry and especially in church planting, the consequences of which reach far beyond your family to your church, your community, and our collective witness for Christ.

For husbands, this means love your wives, just as Christ loved the church. He gave up his life for her – Ephesians 5:25 (NLT)

Church Planter:
– What boundaries have you set up to protect your marriage and your spouse?
– How are you intentionally and regularly cherishing your spouse?
– What needs to change in your life and routine to “love your wife as Christ loved the church”?

P.S. Are you preparing to plant a church? Recently planted? How is your spouse feeling about that? Here’s the link to “Is My Husband’s Call My Call,” a resource that my wife Kelley and I put together specifically for you (the downloadable version is 50% off this week):
https://nelsonsearcy.infusionsoft.com/cart/store.jsp?view=4&i=p165&navicat=53&navisubcat=111&naviprod=165

© Nelson Searcy. All Rights Reserved.

About Nelson Searcy

Nelson Searcy is an experienced church growth strategist, pastor, church planter and coach, consulting with churches around the world. As founder of Church Leader Insights and the Renegade Pastors Network, he has personally trained more than 3,500 church leaders in over 45 denominations through live events, seminars and monthly coaching. Nelson is also the Founding and Lead Pastor of The Journey Church, with locations across New York City and in Boca Raton, FL. Nelson and his church routinely appear on lists such as “The 50 Most Influential Churches” and “The 25 Most Innovative Leaders.” He is the author of over 100 church growth resources and 18+ books, including The Renegade Pastor: Abandoning Average in Your Life, Ministry and The Difference Maker: Using Your Everyday Life for Eternal Impact, and At the Cross with the People Who Were There. He and his wife, Kelley, have one son, Alexander.