Kerrick Thomas here – Executive Pastor at The Journey Church. Nelson’s on vacation this week, so today I’m sharing the second of two guest blog posts with you about mastering the relationship between the Lead Pastor and the Executive (or Associate) Pastor:
“Never let loyalty and kindness leave you! Tie them around your neck as a reminder. Write them deep within your heart.” – Proverbs 3:3
In my years of leading the Executive/Associate Pastors Tele-Coaching Network – the one issue that I’ve found causes the most frustration to both Lead Pastors and Executive/Associate Pastors is TENSION in the relationship that keeps them from being able to be effective as a team…and honestly – prevents them from being able to enjoy their job and each other.
I can’t count the number of times I’ve spoken to an Executive Pastor who has told me…
“My Lead Pastor doesn’t treat me fairly.”
“My Lead Pastor doesn’t give me the credit or respect that I deserve.”
“My Lead Pastor doesn’t give me enough authority…or gives me too much responsibility.”
“My Lead Pastor just doesn’t get it. I would do things differently.”
My response to these complaints is always the same. The issue isn’t with your Lead Pastor… it’s in your heart.
Your Lead Pastor isn’t the one who is going to make your ministry fulfilling… it’s up to you. And God has put you in this ministry position under the spiritual leadership of this Lead Pastor. And He has you there for a reason. To grow you. To test you. And to use you.
And if you are going to be used by God as an Executive Pastor – there are two character traits you better get down:
Loyalty and Kindness
That’s why I love Proverbs 3:3.
(1) As an Executive or Associate Pastor you are called to be loyal to God and to the church… but you have also been placed in a place of service to the Lead Pastor at your church. And God wants you to be loyal.
And I don’t mean loyal as in just not leading a church revolt.
I mean loyal as in not gossiping. Never, ever speaking poorly of the Lead Pastor to other staff or church members. Not contradicting or criticizing final decisions publicly. Taking the blame for unpopular decisions (when appropriate) instead of just saying, “Well that’s what the big guy wanted.” And protecting the reputation and ministry of the Lead Pastor at all costs.
If you can’t be loyal in every way – you shouldn’t be serving in this position.
(2) As an Executive or Associate Pastor you should always speak and act with kindness first. Especially in your relationship with your Lead Pastor.
Listen…I’ve served with Nelson (Lead Pastor @ The Journey) for almost 9 years. And I have a ton of admiration and respect for him. But… trust me… he’s far from perfect. In fact… in my honest opinion he’s made some bad decisions and at times he’s said something to me or treated me in a way that I didn’t like. And I’ve done the same to him.
But I’ve learned over the years that kindness goes a long way. When I need to correct Nelson or I disagree with him… I don’t shout or take him on in front of other staff in a way that demeans him or undermines his authority. I have a private conversation with him and give him the respect that he deserves… that he has earned.
When I’m angry… I try to hold my tongue. When a decision is made that I disagree with… I give him the benefit of the doubt.
Loyalty and kindness. Executive Pastors… if we make those 2 words part of our everyday ministry and life – not only will our relationship with our Lead Pastor improve… but when we stand before God one day we will hear the words “Well done my good and faithful servant.”
In my Executive/Associate Pastor Tele-Coaching Network I spend time focusing on the role of the Executive Pastor and how that supports and fits with the role of the Lead Pastor. And I’ve seen time after time the relationship improve personally and in effectiveness.
My next round of Executive Pastor Coaching begins on January 27, 2011 and last for 10 months. In that network we will focus on:
- Implementing, evaluating and improving the 8 Systems of the church
- Leading and growing staff
- Hiring and firing staff
- The Stewardship System and greatly increasing the giving capacity of your church
- Improving the Senior Pastor relationship
- Developing strategies that work
- Leadership development for the Executive Pastor
- And much, much more…
You can find out more here:
http://www.churchleaderinsights.com/coaching/exe.php
“My experience with the XP network was well worth my investment of time and finances. Kerrick has a very common sense approach to ministry and coaching. The resources you receive are invaluable, the illustrations and examples are real and the access you have to him is a tremendous benefit. I wish I would’ve done this coaching years ago. If you don’t think you can afford the coaching – think again. You will benefit way more even if you only implement one of the many things you learn. Our church has already implemented fusion and activate. We are in the process of implementing the stewardship plan as well. You will learn more in 10 months with Kerrick than you would in 3 years on your own. Trust me – I did.”
Gary Fowler
Executive Pastor
C3 Church – Pinkerington, OH
“Kerrick,
Just wanted to let you know that I really enjoyed being in the XP network these last two years. I grew so much as a husband, father, and leader. I am really going to miss being a part of this! It is clearly evident that the Lord has His hand on you and the Journey Church. I love learning especially when it comes to what makes the “church work”
Your brother in Christ,
Lee Holley
Executive Pastor
Calvary Chapel – Port St. Lucie, FL
Share This Post
© Nelson Searcy. All Rights Reserved.
About Nelson Searcy
