Leadership Lessons… from Dale Carnegie

How much time do you spend with great leaders? I suggest that you spend at least an hour or so a day learning from them, however you can (through books, tapes, seminars, etc.) That’s why I’m doing this “Leadership Lessons” blog mini-series this week. I want to encourage you to be proactive about learning from some of the strongest leaders of our time. Hopefully, you’ll use these blogs as a jumping off point for your own study of influential leaders and their leadership principles.

Today, let’s take a look at what Dale Carnegie has to say about Listening to Learn:

“The secret of influencing people lies not so much in being a good talker as in being a good listener. Most people trying to win others to their way of thinking do too much talking themselves. Let the other people talk themselves out. Listen patiently and with an open mind. Be sincere about it. Encourage them to express their ideas fully. They will never forget it. And you will learn a thing or two. Nobody is more persuasive than a good listener.”

– Dale Carnegie (The Leader In You, pp. 92-93)

This is great advice for those of us who talk for a living. We get into the habit of using our words to persuade people, when really we would do well to step back and listen to what others have to say. Interestingly, when you let other people talk and you truly listen, you gain much more influence over them than you realize. If you are willing to hear them out, even if you don’t agree, you earn their respect and trust. Take a few minutes today to think about how well you listen to those around you. Are you doing all the talking or are you listening to your staff, your members, your family? Remember, the best leaders are the best listeners.

– Nelson

P.S. – If you want to spend some time reading Dale Carnegie, I suggest How to Win Friends and Influence People, The Quick and Easy Way to Effective Speaking and The Leader In You.

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About Nelson Searcy

Nelson Searcy is an experienced church growth strategist, pastor, church planter and coach, consulting with churches around the world. As founder of Church Leader Insights and the Renegade Pastors Network, he has personally trained more than 3,500 church leaders in over 45 denominations through live events, seminars and monthly coaching. Nelson is also the Founding and Lead Pastor of The Journey Church, with locations across New York City and in Boca Raton, FL. Nelson and his church routinely appear on lists such as “The 50 Most Influential Churches” and “The 25 Most Innovative Leaders.” He is the author of over 100 church growth resources and 18+ books, including The Renegade Pastor: Abandoning Average in Your Life, Ministry and The Difference Maker: Using Your Everyday Life for Eternal Impact, and At the Cross with the People Who Were There. He and his wife, Kelley, have one son, Alexander.

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